I hate being stressed out. I am extremely stressed out right now and I don't know how much longer I can take it. There are so many things changing around me and I feel like I am just standing still. All of my friends have someone in their life and I am all alone, all of my friends have a job and money, most of my friends have graduated already and I am a stupid 6
th year textile and clothing major (what the hell am I going to do with that?) , I am extremely unhappy with my appearance, my parents are low on money and I feel guilty they have to help me live outside their house, I cant seem to fall asleep until between 3-5 every night, I don't have an appetite, I have a horrible cough, and my grandma is dying. Life is really hard right now, for some reason harder than I can ever remember. It feels like everyone has shed their unhappiness and somehow it found me. I don't feel like me at all, I am just going through the motions of living but I am not really there and I cant seem to fix it. I feel like crying all the time. I feel like I have to keep everything inside, which I know is a really bad thing to do, but I feel stupid and that no one really wants to listen or cares. I also don't wan to talk about some things in fear of ruining someone
else's happiness. I don't like being a downer, no one likes to hang around a depressed person all the time, but
that's all I feel.
I just want two things right now~ I want my grandma's suffering to end and I want to find myself again, or maybe I am still trying to figure out who that is.........